All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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