saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
