We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
