it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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