I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
from now on my penis is your penis
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
