just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
