...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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