The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
