yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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