All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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