there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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