listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
