...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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