yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
