do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
you win again, gameday.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
