i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
