At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
