didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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