i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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