Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I'm both gender and math confused
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
