Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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