The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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