So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I am available for nakedness
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
