I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
