Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
