so let's talk penis.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
