i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
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