Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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