ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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