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Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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