Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
