it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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