i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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