Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize