she looked like the before picture.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
