Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize