have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Randomize
