No subtext here. People are naked.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
