Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
