My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
