I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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