It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Shame is for Republicans.
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