We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
