I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
