I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
