Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
