It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
