he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
