yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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