Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
be right there i have to get my cape
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
